Never play cat and mouse games if you're a mouse

As every cat owner knows, nobody owns a cat.

If a cat spoke, it would say things like "Hey, I don't see the problem here."

Dogs come when they're called. Cats take a message and get back to you later.

Anyone who claims that a cat cannot give a dirty look either has never kept a cat or is singularly unobservant.

Do not meddle in the affairs of cats, for they are subtle and will piss on your computer.

In a cat's eyes, all things belong to cats." 

Thousands of years ago, cats were worshipped as gods. Cats have never forgotten this.

People that hate cats will come back as mice in their next life.

There are many intelligent species in the universe. They are all owned by cats.

There is no snooze button on a cat who wants breakfast.

Cats aren't clean, they're just covered with cat spit
One cat just leads to another." 

Dogs have owners, cats have staff.

"Kittens are born with their eyes shut. They open them in about six days, take a look around, then close them again for the better part of their lives.

A dog will flatter you but you have to flatter the cat.

If animals could speak the dog would be a blundering outspoken fellow, but the cat would have the rare grace of never saying a word too much.

Cats are a tonic, they are a laugh, they are a cuddle, they are at least pretty just about all of the time and beautiful some of the time.

Cats are smarter than dogs. You can't get eight cats to pull a sled through snow.

"If a dog jumps in your lap, it is because he is fond of you; but if a cat does the same thing, it is because your lap is warmer.

To err is human, to purr is feline.

Dogs eat. Cats dine.

A cat can maintain a position of curled up somnolence on your knee until you are nearly upright. To the last minute she hopes your conscience will get the better of you and you will settle down again.

"If the claws didn't retract, cats would be like Velcro.